Midweek Faith Lift
September 19, 2018
Love and Collaboration
UCOA’s Points of Light
Rev. Deb Hill-Davis
The best place to begin is to say that working with the Board and with all of you to identify our Points of Light was a labor of love and required a high level of collaboration. Our intention with the Points of Light is to make it a dynamic reality that guides our discernments and decisions as a spiritual community. Many organizations, Unity churches included, do an exercise to identify “Core Values” and then pass out cards to ask the members to pledge to support the “core values.” And then the document sits on the shelf or in a drawer in the minister’s office until time immemorial….or until the next minister comes and discovers it! And says to him or herself, oh, they have already done that! I wonder how they live it! We do NOT want that to happen here at UCOA.
We have some significant decisions to make about ourselves as a spiritual community as we move into the next 25 years and beyond. What do we envision for Unity of Ames? What do we want to see when we walk through the front door in 2020? In 2025? In 2043, which is the 50-year mark for UCOA? Everything that we do and say here today is a work in progress, just like we are individually. UCOA is a dynamic growing being, and we are privileged to discern and decide with Spirit how that will unfold. And just like our own personal lives, there are always bumps in the road. That is the weather. We have a leaky roof right now. There is the challenge of making the Community Room handicapped accessible by raising the floor. Our most significant challenge is to discern and decide what the climate is here at UCOA and how do we co-create that climate or that consciousness together with Spirit?
The Points of Light are so important because our intention is that they light the path for us now and in all the days to come. Our intention is that they light the path for those who come after us as well. To keep these front and center, we are going to spend the next 3 weeks exploring what we mean by each one and how we discerned them. They are on a brochure that is in the welcome packets. We will also put them on the website. There is a display that Mark Barrett made in the Book Nook for all to see when they enter our building. We have created an energy field here at UCOA, and as we noted at the Healing Fair, people notice it when they come in the door.
About a year ago at the Sept. 2017 Board Retreat, we went through a process to identify these 6 Points of Light. It is important to also note that all the information that was gathered at World Café Meetings that we have had was a part of this Points of Light Process. We began by sharing with each other what we valued and appreciated in one another. Then we devoted time to exploring what it really means when we say: “Through the Christ Spirit in us, we create a better church and a better world! So be it!” I love it that this statement is open-ended and simple. It challenges us with what Teresa Propes spoke about in her message: the Power of HOW??
To answer that question, we looked at where we spend our time and where we spend our money here at UCOA. What are the themes in these things and what gives us the most joy? We worked backwards from our actions to our rationale for doing all that we do. And we left it open to Spirit to guide our path and discussion. And then last October, we brought it to you and asked for your input, reactions and ideas. And you had them, all of which was then incorporated into the final document, which is included in the Points of Light Brochure. Thank you to Nancy Evans for editing all our work and to Mark Barrett for creating the document.
Love is the first thing we identified as a Point of Light. What does that mean for us? Well, we care for each other, we pray for each other, we sing together, we greet and hug each other on Sundays and other days of the week. For us it also means letting go and letting God, which means we allow Spirit to work in all circumstances, no matter how challenging. We acknowledge that Spirit is present always and in all ways. Our intention is to grow in Consciousness and to see things from that Higher Consciousness.
And here is the real kicker: we hold the intention to see the Christ within us all, no matter how heavily disguised. This means that we hold space for the Divine energy no matter how many times our buttons get pushed. There are so many definitions and explanations of Love, which in our Divine/Human journey get all garbled and confused. So how do we experience Love here at UCOA?
When I was in graduate school the first time back in the late 70’s, I was learning counseling skills and deep listening skills. The model for therapy was Carl Rogers’ Non-Directive Counseling. The essential skill was to hold each client in “unconditional positive regard.” No matter how offensive, how dunderheaded, how difficult, that was the starting point: unconditional positive regard. That was my personal approach in working with kids in the schools. I can’t say that I always did that with the parents, teachers and administrators! Over time, I have come to realize that this is the essential element in walking in Love. This is what Jesus meant when he said “Follow me.”
Why is this so important? What is our rationale for beginning with Love?
It is the start point for us here at UCOA. No matter who you are or how you show up when you come through the door, our intention is to love and accept you and see the Christ in you. And we do that by showing up, by listening, by being open and accepting. We allow what is there to be there and we allow ourselves to feel whatever it is we feel. That is part of the loving process. That allows us to rise above our “reactive responses” to seek a higher consciousness.
Remember when we did the 5 Love Languages? People don’t always speak love in the same way, so we want to learn how you speak love and share how we speak love. That is our starting point.
When we sing, pray, listen to the message, meditate together, reflect on what is said on Sunday morning, and sit in this Sanctuary together, we create an energy field of love and peace that resonates with us and all who come through these doors. We are a thinking community, we reflect, we share and we learn from one another and we ask questions. When we are “unloving” we call each other out. That is also love in action. Our joy comes from this loving and sharing and welcoming each other into this space every Sunday. We come here to practice the Presence of Love, of Spirit. We come here experience the Presence and to celebrate that we are alive and able to BE that Presence for one another. We are each angels with skin on for each other. We make love real.
Collaboration is our second light and it is a big one here at UCOA. We really do work together to keep this community going, to keep it growing in all ways. We work together really well. And we share leadership when needed. When the basement flooded several years ago and I was out of town, I saw the photos on our Facebook page of everyone cleaning up the mess and hauling out the carpet. I even saw a photo of Spencer, JoAnn’s son on the roof cleaning out the gutters! That is true collaboration—working together to solve a problem or reach a goal—and I wasn’t even here. This is a community of commitment and shared ownership.
We sing a line in one of the Greeting songs we have: “This is a place we all belong….” And that is so true, we all belong, we are all needed and when we see a need we step up and pitch in, often without even being asked. This is our spiritual community and that has been my mantra ever since I arrived. Many ministers will speak of “my church” but I have consciously chosen to describe UCOA as our spiritual community, because that is what it is. I enjoy the delightful blessing to be the spiritual leader. Su Podraza-Nagle playfully calls me boss all the time, but I am the spiritual leader of our shared community, which belongs to all of us.
What that means to me is that we make decisions together and when we do that, we create forums to listen to everyone’s opinions and feelings about what we are going to do. That doesn’t mean that everyone always agrees with each decision or that we only proceed with 100% agreement. It does mean that we work together, we talk it through and we discern what is ours to do. We have many initiatives at Unity of Ames that not everyone participates in and that is a good thing. Each one has a leader who champions the initiative and the rest of us step up and support it. That is how the Angel Garden happened. That is how the Healing Fair and the Drumming Circle happened. And the MICA Food Drive and the Pounds for Hounds and Kitties’, too! And Reader’s Theatre!
What we do aim for in our Points of Light under Collaboration is to be non-judgmental as we engage in service. As noted not everyone is called to do everything. We are highlighting Sacred Service at UCOA this fall so that we can take a deeper look at all that is happening here. I don’t lead or really participate in Reader’s Theatre or the Angel Gardens, but I sure do support them, and I have filled in a time or two. And here’s the deal: I would much rather have us try something and fail and learn about ourselves than not try at all. If it takes us to the edge of our emotional, psychological and spiritual growth, then so be it! That is why we are here: to learn to work together and to grow.
Now this is a loaded word, but the true opposite of collaboration is collusion and I have seen it happen in churches. This is when the shadow side of collaboration shows up. Instead of speaking directly, people gather outside in the parking lot and have “parking lot” conversations. Nothing destroys a true sense of community more quickly than not addressing issues of concern and bringing them into the light. Could that happen to us? Yes it could if we let it, if we go unconscious and start judging one another. It is far easier to blame someone else than it is that to say the hard thing directly to the people involved. Many of you have spoken directly to me about concerns and I am so grateful. You have made me a better minister! The blame game is collusion and it keeps the shadow going. Our intention is to collaborate and to bring conflicts into the light….all of us, together as a community.
As we continue together to live into our Points of Light, we will face challenges and encounter our shadow. So be it! That is how we grow into spiritual maturity, together, as a spiritual community. Next week we explore Inclusion and Connection…..with a visit from the Coneheads!
Blessings on the Path,
Rev. Deb