Midweek Faith Lift
November 26, 2025
Grateful –We Belong to Each Other
Rev. Deb Hill-Davis
Spiritual Passages
November 17, 2025
‘GRATEFUL FOR KITH AND KIN'
The phrase “kith and kin” - from Old English - carries a deeper wisdom that is sometimes overlooked. It illustrates how wide the circle of our belonging truly is. Kith refers to the people and places that shape our daily life — friends, neighbors, familiar communities, and the landscapes we know by heart, while kin refers to those connected to us by family ties, the relatives who share our lineage and story. Together, kith and kin describe a wide circle of belonging that embraces our friends and family as well as the broader communion of creatures, land, and life with whom we share our home.
To further illustrate this we have a story:
A woman inherited a quilt stitched by three generations. Some squares were beautiful, some faded, some patched over more times than anyone could count. When she spread it across her bed, she realized the quilt wasn’t perfect — but it was warm. Kith and kin are much the same: a patchwork of personalities and histories, held together by threads sturdier than anyone can explain.
And for some humor:
An elderly aunt at a family reunion once said, “Remember, family is like fudge: mostly sweet - with a few nuts.”
Affirmative Prayer for Today: Loving Presence of God, we open to our highest and best good as we are woven together and knit together by light and love. We hold a mindset of gratitude for all that is part of our lives on this day. Amen.
Today, after this service, we will gather with ‘kith & kin’ to celebrate the bounty of our harvest from all the gardens in what is now called the “Grow and Give” program. These fellow “Grow and Give” folks are part of our wide circle of belonging and woven into the imperfect quilt that we are all a part of here at Unity of Ames. As we pause to celebrate our Harvest of Gratitude, it is worth remembering that what we bless, what we appreciate and what we give our attention to increases! It is essential that we pause and actually see the miracle of increase and see the people who were fed by our gardens. We tend to think in numbers, pound of produce, number of people fed, but our true mission is to see the people as people.
One of the issues we struggle with in our culture is to truly see one another, just as we are. Todd and I just returned from a long weekend in New Orleans and we stayed in the French Quarter, which was quite challenging. The crowding, the noise, and the density of people in that small area make it very stressful. On Friday, as we walked around, there was a homeless man sitting on the sidewalk at a narrow, busy place blocking the foot traffic, wanting to be seen. As we checked into the hotel, there was a man just standing in the street, right in the middle, just standing there. Then across the street from the hotel were what we called the “bucket beaters” who had 5 gallon utility buckets upside down beating them with sticks, making a huge racket such that we could hardly hear the directions for how to park the car.
Even as we left Des Moines on Thursday as we sat in the airport at our gate, there was an announcement asking the person who was just standing in the middle of the street right in front of the airport drop-off lanes to move. This announcement happened more than once, finally asking the man with the white hat standing in the middle of the street to move…more than once. I have no idea why he was there…other than he wanted to be seen.
On my last day, Sayre, Sarah and I went to a playground for children 2-5 years of age. There was a mom there with triplets who looked to be about just barely 2 and they were running around, climbing the slide while the mom was on her cell phone. Until one of them fell and got hurt and cried loudly. Then he was seen! I don’t judge this mom. We are all part of a culture that is caught up in not really seeing each other so it is no wonder we don’t see our kids either.
Let’s take a breath and realize how much we deeply need to see each other and to feel seen. There is an African word “Subono” which is used by various tribes when they greet each other. Subono means “I see you!” It is a greeting that allows both the greeter and greeted to feel really “seen.” Perhaps we need a huge dose of Subono in our world right now, so that we begin to see with softer eyes, compassionate eyes the presence of our kith and kin and what they are experiencing. Perhaps if we felt seen without judgment, we would not need to stand in the street in Des Moines or in New Orleans or wherever we might be. We know that kids in a classroom will act out to be seen by the adults because any attention is better than being ignored. It is a skilled, perceptive teacher who recognizes this behavior as a cry for help and responds with compassionate, effective attention.
There is another African word “Ubuntu” that is powerful and relevant for us.
It is a Bantu word from the Nguni languages of southern Africa. It is often translated as “I am because we are.” Ubuntu expresses a deep sense of shared humanity - that our lives, dignity, and well-being are woven together. This is a word that sees the whole of each of us. It makes our connections real, like that imperfect quilt representing kith and kin, it exists because we exist. Perfection is not the point, monetary value is not the need, connection heart to heart is the higher perspective, no matter how messy or difficult. Subono- I see you! Ubuntu-“I am because we are.” In this messy quilt, we all exist because of and for each other.
Now there is a powerful story of seeing and responding to each other that is told in the gospel of Matthew. It is a story of giving thanks, seeing and blessing what is there. Throughout the gospel stories, Jesus always gave thanks and blessed the food and the people. It is from Matthew 14:17-21, the story of the 5 loaves and 2 fish and multitude of hungry people.
Matthew 14:17-21
17 They replied, “We have nothing here but five loaves and two fish.” 18 And he said, “Bring them here to me.” 19 Then he ordered the crowds to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish, he looked up to heaven and blessed and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the crowds. 20 And all ate and were filled, and they took up what was left over of the broken pieces, twelve baskets full. 21 And those who ate were about five thousand men, besides women and children.
What happened in this story that makes it so remarkable and noteworthy? Well, if we pause we notice that Jesus paused to look at who was there. He saw the humanity of the hungry people. He looked at the 5 loaves and 2 fish and did not lament, “Oh this is not enough, it will never be enough!” I might have said that for sure. To be completely honest, I might have said, “Not my circus, not my monkeys, let’s get out of here and find something to eat! We can come back later and see what else Jesus has to say!” I am after all, fully human and also hungry!
What is remarkable is that no one left, not even the disciples. He ordered the crowd to sit on the grass and they did! Peacefully and patiently, they sat on the earth. They waited and watched as Jesus invoked a blessing, a higher consciousness by looking up to “Heaven” which is our God consciousness to multiply what he had. Then he instructed the disciples to pass it out to the people and they did. The true miracle here is that Jesus was seen, the disciples and all the people were seen and then able to eat their fill. It is important to note that the passage specifically mentions women and children as they always had to wait for the men to eat first in this culture. That a powerful statement of “Subono” and “Ubuntu!”
Take a moment and also appreciate the numbers that are mentioned in this story. There are lots of 2”s, 5’s and 12’s all through the story. The passage tells us 5000 men plus women and children, 12 disciples, 2 fish and 5 loaves and then 12 baskets left over. Metaphysically, this represents a beautiful interweaving of our humanity and our divinity. The 5’s represent our human needs, our senses, our hunger. The 2’s represent our humanity/divinity which is present in all 5000 of us and the number 12 is a number of spiritual completion- it is what happens when our humanity/divinity come together in a deeply spiritual way and we experience “Subono” and “Ubuntu.” We see each other and we see our deep connections.
At your thanksgiving this year, I wish you “Subono” and “Ubuntu”
May It Be So….
Blessings on the Path,
Rev. Deb